The first feeling was jealously not joy.
My brain was telling me to say "Congratulations, I'm so happy for you."
And I did, right after "You've got to be fucking kidding me. The practice run try?"
She's 31. She's got fresh sperm. It was easy.
She's by far my favorite relative in all of Chicken's family and it IS going to be super cool having another cousin so close in age.
And yet the news still hit me a bit like acid being thrown.
We told her before anyone in our family. And now we know before anyone else as well. I'm flattered we are the first to know.
I am truly joyful for her and wish her a great pregnancy.
But damn. That initial reaction.
It never gets easier.
Does it?
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11 comments:
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Nope, it doesn't. Preach it sister!
I agree. It never gets easier and for me it is hard to admit the bitterness of fertility PTSD.
God, I feel like such an ass admitting it, but I feel the same way sometimes. I didn't think I was that kind of person, and it isn't a competition, but there you go.
Totally agree with everyone else. I'm still such a bitter Betty about the TTC process. A friend of ours sister and partner just found out they are pregnant. My first question wasn't when are they due, nut how long did it take them to get a BFP. I think this whole process leaves permanent emotional scars.
nope, it doesnt. im still bitter too. *hugs*
It just bites. I feel so lucky to have her, but nothing erases two and half years.
It certainly does bite! I haven't even tried that many times (only twice, 3 years ago) and it still hurts!! Why do some people have it so easy?
Unfortunately I don't think it does. The grass is always going to be greener somewhere...whether it's infertility-related, easier-birth-than-you-had-related, the-girl-you-always-wanted-related...whatever is it. Resentment sucks.
It hasn't yet for me. *hugs*
I HOPE it gets easier, eventually...
So far, nah.
But eventually. Hopefully.
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