Thursday, January 8, 2009

Dirty Deeds

I'm ovulating right about now and realized that last night in the gym I was checking out every decent looking guy around me. Just decent. My standards used to be so much higher.
When I mentioned this to K she said, "Should we call B?" "Maybe, he's always up for it." "It seems like a good idea, but it's probably not." "Yeah, I know, he might have cooties." "Yeah."
We have an old friend, a very good looking, multi-millionaire, French playboy friend, who would be more than happy to sperm me up. It could be fun. It could be dangerous. He could shoot blanks.

You might be thinking to yourself right now...is she a lesbian? Most of the time, yes. I hate labels. I am what I am. Love me or not.

I guess we'll go see a movie tonight instead--it's much safer.

9 comments:

A said...

You crack me up! So Funny. It's not wrong to find people attractive. Doesn't matter if they are male or female. Being yourself is ok with me. :)

Malea said...

lmao! I find myself checking potential spermie donors out on the train. From head to toe I access their genetic prowse wonder how high his IQ might be.lol

Then I get to work and text a friend to tell her my baby daddy just got off at west 4th. Maybe I should print up little business cards to slip to the potential gents.You know with instruction to go to an address and put said junk in said cup for baby mama #8888. Hummmm....wouldn't that be a hoot.

Of course pay them if they don't turn out to be dumb as a stump after testing and interview.

anofferingoflove said...

ever since we started this process, i look at men and think "he'd be a good donor" or "he wouldn't be a good donor." my SIL thinks im crazy. sigh.

what movie are you seeing??

queerstork said...

Oh, I was doing that over the weekend at an Indian buffet. Guys would walk up to fill up on their pappadums and I was wondering about their sperm counts.

I briefly considered a backseat tryst but... the STD thing scares me every time!

Have fun tonight!

cindyhoo2 said...

ha ha! My partner and I do the same thing. We now have a secret language of raised eyebrows and half sentences to size up fellas offspring potential. But yea, the whole STD thing really puts a kink in that plan. :)Sigh, guess we'll keep buying sperm, as God intended. LOL

Heidi said...

He he he. Why not? I think the human body is a work of art...what is wrong in appreciating it?

And judging it.

And it's potential.

And it's potency?

Lizzie said...

Hey - missing you, thinking of you, checking back in, so sorry to see you're not pregnant yet. Here's to 2009 for both (all) of us! xo

Keely said...

So, describe this French Playboy type...

eeney meeney miney mommy said...

Criticaly sizing up every random guy I see is one of my favorite pastimes!

When the f#@k is that dumb B*#tch sarah palin going to go away??? Oh sorry, distracted by the tv for a moment.