Sunday, October 17, 2010

Our Kitchen is Spotless, Not Us

As I was cleaning up the kitchen last night I pondered out loud, "I don't think we've ever gone to bed with dirty dishes in the sink, have we?"
Chicken looked at me absolutely horrified and exclaimed loudly, "Oh god NO. I mean, I just...couldn't."
A clean house. That is clearly where our priorities lay. It drives both of us crazy to have a dirty, messy house.
A daily shower on the other hand? Priority? Not so much.
And since I'm back taking Fenugreek and Blessed Thistle for my milk supply, that means yours truly pretty much smells like a maple syrup dipped curry puff. It's not a bad smell, just different.

Because the thing is, I can clean up the house and keep one eye (or both!) on the kids. Taking a shower? Cannot do.
I've read that some moms get up before the baby does so they can take a shower and put on makeup. Oh hell no. Especially since as of late, little Grunter has decided 5 or 5:30am is an acceptable wake up time and as of very recently--as in the last three days--he has started his day between 4:15 and 4:45. So, showering beforehand? I think not.

Then, there's the option of showering during their morning nap. Except that's when I nap as well. You I can stay ALIVE. So again...choices....sleep or shower? SLEEP.

What about that afternoon nap? Well, that one is when I pump, feed myself, clean up all their food mess, make baby food, prep the next days baby meals, prep our dinner for that night, brush my teeth for the first time of the day, change out of my house outfit (yoga pants, nursing tank--usually the same ones I wore the day before until I realize I've been wearing the same clothes for...who knows? Who cares!), dab on concealer under my eyes and put on real clothes so I can take the boys out when they wake up. If the cat is lucky, I'll even remember to feed him. Since the babies his name has become "Poor Cat."
Not really any time for a shower. I've tested this and as soon as I sit down on the toilet, a baby will wake up. So, getting in the shower? Not going to happen.

I have the goal of taking a shower at night. Sometimes that happens. Often times, it does not.
By the time we get the babies to bed, pump, clean up the bath stuff, the highchairs, the dishes, the floor, wash the bottles, cook, eat and clean up dinner, pump again, clean the pumping gear....I'm DONE. I do not want to talk on the phone. I do not want to blog (well, I DO, but I am often to tired to actually do so), I don't want to do much. I'm so exhausted that even taking a shower sounds like too much work.
Plus to top it off, I'm having insomnia and we're trying to go to bed earlier since the boys are insisting on starting the day at an ungodly hour. There's just not enough time to do it all.

So now you know. My dirty little secret. I am an unclean woman. And I don't care.

Now I'm many of you SAHM's shower everyday and WHEN do you do it??


N said...

Me? I'm a mean, mean mommy. If I don't get it done before she gets up or when she's napping (I can't nap during the day, never been able to unless I'm really ill), if I want a shower, I'll stick her in the jumper (with or without tv accompaniment) and turn up the water to drown out the screams. ;-)

Laurie said...

When we are home alone with Ryan, he goes in his pack n play with toys he can't hurt himself with/on and shower away! It's actually the only time we put him in there, lol.

Jen said...

Being that I work fulltime, I shower every morning :) but I often shower with him in the bathroom with me in his little rocking chair. He is strapped in and I clean myself. Now, getting dressed, hair and make up is often harder but I manage every morning and get out of the door by 7:30. It is hard work and I am exhausted by the time I get to
my desk-- coffee and breakfast in hand! I can't imagine 2 babies because one is hard!

Kate said...

I shower everyday- but I go to bed with a dirty house all the time! Sounds like you would just die if you saw my house.

reproducinggenius said...

As a SAHM, it is often appealing to just forego the shower, but I find that I feel a little more human if I do, so I take his little inflatable bathtub, put it on the floor of the bathroom with a few toys in it, put him in it, and get in. I play peek-a-boo with the shower curtain from time to time. The first time I did it, I had forgotten to remove my mascara, so when I peeked out at him, I terrified him. This was the only time I got out of the shower unclean and with, perhaps, some residual conditioner in my hair. After that, though, it went really well. He knows exactly where I am; I know where he is, and I usually get a nice long shower! Now, with two, I don't know if this would work so well, but it might!

Kimberly said...

Just a creeper, but loved your post. I'm still on maternity leave, but I have twin boys and I'm in N's boat - I shower while they scream. But I can only stand to make them scream it out every other day. That means I'm unshowered (and feeling rather gross) half of the time. AND my house is a mess, so at least you have one out of two! Half the time I'm 0 for 2. =)

Guinevere said...

My solution is that we shower together after lunch. (I usually workout during the am nap and we have lunch right after, so then I'm sweaty and he's food covered, so that combination really incentivizes a shower happening.) He's been taking showers since he was about 2 weeks old, so he totally doesn't mind showering rather than bathing... and I've gotten good at one-handed shampooing/conditioning/leg-shaving. That routine means that I shower most days - but if the workout doesn't happen, the shower doesn't either.

I could see how more than one baby would make getting showers much, much harder though.

K J and the kids said...

OMG this is me. SO hilarious and true.
My kids will be dressed and pressed and ready for the world and I will still be in my jammies when my wife comes home from work some days.
but damn it the house is clean and dinner is cooked.

As my kids have gotten older....I do find more time to shower. Well except for those pesky damn babies who get in to EVERYTHING when my back is turned. It's always a dangerous decision. I will now shower when they nap though.

One day. I hope to shower at least 3 times a week :)

Jackie said...

L loves to play in the bathroom and watch the water drip down the shower door, so I'm a shower-every-day (or at least most days) kind of a gal. Could you just bring a fee toys in there and let the boys play?

existere said...

Don't hate me, but I shower every day. We all wake up, I head straight to the shower while TMD is with the babies (getting them dressed, etc), then I am with the babies while she showers. She then leaves for work, I stay at home, etc.

Amy said...

I always tried to shower when the kids were babies. I would either put them in the exersaucer or their cribs w/ soft toys while I showered. I still go to bed with dirty dishes by the sink and the youngest at our house is 7. And I stay home while they're at school during the day. I am busy, and the dishes don't always make priority - like last night when I had fun planning our next vacation instead of doing housework!

Strawberry said...

Not SAHMs but we either take showers when he's still sleeping or napping, or tag team it. And sometimes if the timing just sucks or only one of us is with him, we'll put him in his crib with toys to take a quick one :)

Anonymous said...

House is a mess ALWAYS (but, it was a mess before the babies too). But, I shower every day...I am disgusting if I don't shower. I shower while the twins (6 months old) take their AM nap.

Tania said...

I'm a SAHM but also babysit kids at my house and a single parent to 3 little ones. I am generally an every-other-day showerer. It's quick and in the morning right after I get up. When my youngest was a baby, I'd put her in the bouncy seat in the bathroom and sing to her or play peek-a-boo or just let her cry for those couple of minutes. Now they are 6, 5, and 2 years old and usually playing while I'm showering. I do leave the door open in case they need something or I need to break up a fight. So, for me, it's about speed...quickly in and quickly out. Shaving, drying my hair, and any sort of make-up usually only happen on Sundays when I have a little more time in the morning before church and without the added daycare kids at my house.

Casey said...

I don't ever shower when I'm home with Bird by myself. Unless she is napping, but then I'm usually cleaning. I'd much rather have a clean house, some warm fresh baked bread, and yummy dinner than a shower. Any day.

n said...

I shower but the kitchen is a mess. I shower while she stands holding onto the side of the tub flapping the shower curtain watching me. Water goes all around. This morning she dropped monkey in the shower with me.

Marcia (123 blog) said...

I'm not a SAHM but when I was on maternity leave, I considered it success if I showered before D got home at 6pm :) Seriously!

And then I'd start moving that time earlier and earlier but the best I ever did was 12pm and that was only because a friend came over for lunch LOL